Jax's temple sealing

What an incredible feeling it is to be sealed to Jax. Today is one of the days that we have been looking forward to for a very long time. Many people asked us how cool it was to go to court and have the adoption finalized. To us it was alright but today was the day that we were really looking forward to. I think it is so awesome that our Heavenly Father recognizes any adopted child just as if they were born into their adopted family under the covenant when we are sealed to them. When Shaileen and I walked into the sealing room it was incredible to see our family and friends there. We have had such love and support throughout everything we have gone through. Throughout the many heartbreaks in the adoption process it just did not effect just the two of us. It effected our family just as much. That is why it was so great to have them there with us to celebrate our FOREVER FAMILY!

Mostly it is just me that blogs but I really think it is super important to get Shaileen's thoughts from today. Here you go :

So my top moments in life, so far, are:
     1- The day I married my best friend,
     2- The day Jax was born,
     3- Bringing Jax home,
     4- finalizing Jax's adoption,
AND now
     5- the we had Jax sealed to us for time and ALL eternity.

Today was such an incredible experience. To know that no matter what happens in this life, Jax will be ours FOREVER!! This process of adoption has taught me so much. It has taught me to never give up, there is always something brighter to look forward to. It has taught me that no matter how lost you think you are, our Father in Heaven can help guide you back. It has taught me that PATIENCE is definitely a virtue. It has taught me that GOD knows ALL. It has taught me to be a strong, independent, loving, caring, hard working, confident, and funny woman. Adoption has taught me to never take advantage the relationship I have and can have with my children. It has taught me that no matter the struggle I can turn to my Father in Heaven for peace and guidance.
When Jax entered the sealing room he was thrilled, it was almost as if he knew what was about to happen. I sometimes wonder how thin the vale is for him still, and how much of what is happening in his life he knew was going to happen.
Today in the sealing room an overwhelming feeling of gratitude poured over my heart and slapped me in the face. I have so much to be grateful for. I feel as if we are always thanking those that have been a part of this journey with us, BUT sometimes we forget to thank the most important person. In the sealing room today, though everything that was happening, I poured my heart out to my Father in Heaven in silent prayer. I thanked him for this incredible MIRACLE he gave to us. I thanked him for trusting me enough to mother this precious child. I thanked him for allowing me to guide him through this life with his help and the help of my wonderful companion. I thanked him for not giving up on me through the years, and keeping his faith in me even when I wavered in my faith in him. lastly, I thanked him for being my strength, and for listening to me when I was sure no one else was.
I feel so much joy in my heart after today. Nothing will ever compare to the amazing experience of sitting across the alter from my incredible husband and our beautiful son, being sealed for TIME AND ALL ETERNITY!!! I know without a doubt that Jax was meant to be a part of our family. We will forever be grateful to his amazing birth mother Sarrina and the beautiful gift she has given us. She not only gave us the child we had longed for, but a new extended family as well. We love our Birth Family and we are so proud to have them in our lives.
I also just want to add that I would be nowhere without my husband. He has stood by me when others have not, at my lowest and at my highest. I know that God provided Kurt for me. He choose Kurt to be mine so he could teach me to be kind, generous, patient, gentle, soft of heart, and most of all faithful. I love you Kurt Reed Cline. You are mine forever and I cherish that thought. I love you madly and I am beyond grateful to share every moment of every day with you.
AND
Jax... one day you will read this. I want you to know that mommy loves you so much. I cried a million tears before I found you. Daddy and I waited, and waited, and waited and we know that Heavenly Father was finding the most special baby to send to us. I love you more than I can put into words. You have my heart little man. I know that one day you will be a daddy, and if you feel even an ounce of the love I have for you for your children you will be the best daddy around. I loved you before I even knew you existed. I have prayed for hours on end hoping that one day those prayers would be answered... Buddy, my prayers were answered with you. I love you my angel, you are my miracle. xoxo - mommy

I asked Shaileen to come into the computer room and not read what I had written earlier in this post but to just write down her feelings for today. WOW! I have no idea why I am the one that blogs because she can pour her heart out way better than I can. Shaileen, I love you too with all of my heart. You are the woman I had been looking for to marry but more importantly be the mother to our child. I love you!

Jax's first time swimming

This past weekend we went out of town to Eden, Utah and stayed at the Wolfcreek Condos. A seperate blog will be coming later with more photos and stories later. I just could not wait to post this video of Jax going swimming for the very first time. The swimming suit was a bit big so we had to roll the top over to make it fit a bit better. Jax absolutely loved swimming. In the video below you will see that he cried for about 10 seconds but then was perfectly fine after that. I think he cried only because it was a little chilly. He stayed in the pool for about 10 minutes and then I took him out and put him in a towel and he zonked out and slept so soundly. We were so happy that he liked the pool so much and can't wait to take him back to another pool in the future.

Jax's Nursery is FINISHED!!!!!

So I finally have finished Jax's nursery!!! It turned out AMAZING! 

ENJOY

I love my little peanut!! He deserves the WORLD! 

Thoughts today on Adoption

I dont know why but I just had an overwhelming feeling that I needed to write down my feelings today that I am having. Again, I dont know why and this is all off of the top of my head so if it does not make sense I appologize.

I am so very thankful for the gift of adoption and the blessings that it has brought into not only my life but also Shaileen's. It is crazy to think that the placement has not even taken place yet but there are all of these blessings and trials that have made us so much stronger as a couple and individual. It is sad to say but when we started trying to have kids I was not ready to be a Dad and I think I knew that I wasn't ready either. Shaileen had been prepared growing up working at day cares and just having a motherly instinct. Sometimes I feel real bad because in the bottom of my heart I know that this trial that we have gone through with infertility has been for me. It has taught me to become more patient and not take children for grantid. I am so thankful of having Shaileen as a loving spouse to spend literally every second together. I love her so much and am so happy to spend eternity with her. She makes me a better person every day. I cannot wait to see her as a mother.

I am also thankful for the sacrifice of "J". She is one incredible woman and we have grown much love for her in the short time we have known her. It seems as if we have known her for a very long time. We were so nervous to meet her at lunch the first time and I won't lie it was a little ackward at first but after about 5-10 minutes it felt very natural. We sat and talked for either 3-4 hours, I don't remember how long but it was long. It is incredible to think that there is someone out there that trusts us so much that they are going to place with us. What an incredible gift she is able to provide. We are excited to grow even closer to her in the future and build that loving relationship for the little one. It is very important to Shaileen and I for our son to know who "J" is. I know that he is going to have a loving relationship with her as well.

Again, sorry if that did not make any sense. I would like to thank the people that follow our blog and have supported us through this adoption process and that will continue to support us. We Love You!

Kurt and Shaileen
(if she agrees with what I wrote, haha)