Thoughts today on Adoption

I dont know why but I just had an overwhelming feeling that I needed to write down my feelings today that I am having. Again, I dont know why and this is all off of the top of my head so if it does not make sense I appologize.

I am so very thankful for the gift of adoption and the blessings that it has brought into not only my life but also Shaileen's. It is crazy to think that the placement has not even taken place yet but there are all of these blessings and trials that have made us so much stronger as a couple and individual. It is sad to say but when we started trying to have kids I was not ready to be a Dad and I think I knew that I wasn't ready either. Shaileen had been prepared growing up working at day cares and just having a motherly instinct. Sometimes I feel real bad because in the bottom of my heart I know that this trial that we have gone through with infertility has been for me. It has taught me to become more patient and not take children for grantid. I am so thankful of having Shaileen as a loving spouse to spend literally every second together. I love her so much and am so happy to spend eternity with her. She makes me a better person every day. I cannot wait to see her as a mother.

I am also thankful for the sacrifice of "J". She is one incredible woman and we have grown much love for her in the short time we have known her. It seems as if we have known her for a very long time. We were so nervous to meet her at lunch the first time and I won't lie it was a little ackward at first but after about 5-10 minutes it felt very natural. We sat and talked for either 3-4 hours, I don't remember how long but it was long. It is incredible to think that there is someone out there that trusts us so much that they are going to place with us. What an incredible gift she is able to provide. We are excited to grow even closer to her in the future and build that loving relationship for the little one. It is very important to Shaileen and I for our son to know who "J" is. I know that he is going to have a loving relationship with her as well.

Again, sorry if that did not make any sense. I would like to thank the people that follow our blog and have supported us through this adoption process and that will continue to support us. We Love You!

Kurt and Shaileen
(if she agrees with what I wrote, haha)