The Luckiest

I have been thinking about this song all day long today. It perfectly describes my feelings towards Shaileen. I am the luckiest man in the world to be able to be with her for eternity. When we were dating we made this 'our song'. It had been a long time since I have heard it or even thought about it. I LOVE YOU SHAILEEN!!!

Animal shelter and family dinner

Saturday morning we woke up and quickly decided that we didn't want to sit at home. So we met Kimberly, Jason, Alex and Dj at the humane society to look at and play with the animals. We also took Carlye with us. We had a great time. My favorite was the big dog that I was in the photo with. It was huge Rottweiler and mastiff mix! After spending about an hour or so there we drove over to Mark's Ark which is on 4800 s Redwood rd. I forgot to take photos there but it is the coolest pet store. Shaileen fell in love with a schnauzer puppy. If you have never been there before I would recommend it, it is cool but just expect stinky and dirty. Haha.

Usually on Sundays we have family dinner but this Sunday Shaileen's dad was going out of town for work so we got together Saturday night for dinner. About 10 minutes before we started eating there was a knock on the door. It was Shaileen's Aunt and cousin that live in Las Vegas that we hardly ever see because of the distance. It was so nice to see them and spend time together for a bit. Shaileen brought over her pie maker that she had not used yet and thought she would try it out. The mini lies were delicious.

How trials turn into good

When we went through our failed adoption placement back the beginning of August of last year it was one of the toughest things both Shaileen and I have ever gone through. When we got the phone call about 12 or so hours before we were supposed to sign papers saying that she had changed her mind it was easily the toughest moments of my life and most likely Shaileens to. It felt like there was no reason to live and we held each other and bawled in the middle of the brick oven restraunt. People were probably wondering what the heck happened and what was going on. We tried to sleep but we ended up talking for a lot of the night and holding each other. I think I actually cried myself to sleep until the nightmares came. The way we were both able to make it through the insanity was because of the love, prayers and support of our family, friends, ward members and coworkers. We certainly would not have been able to make it through it without them. After the situation happened I kept telling myself that things happen for a reason and that we can and will make it and will be stronger because of it. The main reason I am writing today is to express that it is absolutely true that things happen for a reason. My favorite thing to tell people that I gained from the experience is Shaileen and I are closer and love each other even more today than we did back then. She is the rock in my life. I love her so much and she makes me a better person each and every day. Another thing as funny as it may sound is it has increased my testimony of the gospel especially the plan of salvation. I know without a shadow of a doubt that Shaileen and I will be parents one day and that we will be an eternal family. I cannot wait for the day that we get to take our child to the temple with us to be sealed for time and all eternity. The thing that has hit me the most that I truely appreciate is several people that we have met that are in the adoption community. They have made us stronger people and we love them so much. You know who are. Trials bring lots of darkness into our lives during the initial time that we are going through them but when we fight through the issues we can and will come out stronger and better people because of them. Like always I personally want to thank everyone for their love, support and kindness towards us. You really do not know how much that means to us.

Tucanos and Harlem Globetrotters

We had one of the best date nights in a very long time. Right when we got home from work we decided to drive down to the Gateway Mall and get dinner at Tucanos Brazillian Grill. It is Shaileen's favorite restraunt as you can tell from the 1st photo. Shaileen enjoys the meat the most, especially the top sirloin. I like the rice and beans the most.

After dinner we met up with Tristen and Nelson and went to see the Harlem Globetrotters at the Energy Solutions Arena. Neither of us had been in the past so we knew what the Harlem Globetrotters was about but had never seen them before. They put on a great show and I would recommend going if you haven't ever been. I look forward to the day that we have kids old enough to take for them to enjoy it.

Open Adoption

About 2 years ago Shaileen and I decided that we were ready to start the adoption process. We prayed and went to the temple and it was confirmed to us that adoption is the way that we are supposed to build our family. We knew that there was a good chance it would not be an easy process and may be long but who are we to not do something just because it may be tough even though it is right. I feel really awkward saying this but when we first started the adoption process we had a tough time understanding and accepting the idea of an open adoption. Open adoption sounds like such a scary thing. We went to the required adoption classes to be approved through LDS family services back on 10-22-2011. As we walked in we were excited to get on with the process of our adoption process. We were looking forward to learn as well. It was a 2 day course. The first day consisted of a panel of adoptive parents sitting in front of us answering questions that the group had. As Shaileen and I left after the first day of classes we were way overwhelmed because the panel of adoptive parents were talking about their open adoption relationships that they had with their child's/children's birth parents. They talked about how they love them and are so happy when they are able to get together with them. Shaileen and I talked as we drove home in tears about if we were really going to be able to follow through with the promises of open adoption. We were scared of co-parenting with the birth parents and just wanting that relationship in general. Were we going to be able to continue? The next morning we woke up and got ready for the second day of classes even though we were resisting it because we were scared of what else we were going to learn. Wow, I sure am glad we went because that was one of the best days during our adoption process that I have had. When we showed up there was a panel of birth mothers. Some of them placed many years ago, some of them within the last couple of years and even some as recently as a month ago. I personally was scared to hear them talk and almost didn't want to listen to them.

 

As soon as the first question was asked and the first woman started speaking I immediately felt the spirit in the room. It was so strong that I could not deny that there is an incredible love that exists throughout the adoption triad (child, birth parents, adoptive parents). The main thing that was thrust into my heart is that the birth mothers as well as fathers have an incredible love for the child. It is not as if at placement the love just went away. They really do continue to care about them and their well being. However, they still have enough love that they choose to place for whatever reasons that they have. Later in the day a group of adoptees (not sure if that is the correct term to use) came and we had some questions for them. Some of them have open adoptions and some of them have closed ones. The main thing that most of them said that they would want to tell their birth parents is that they really are ok and that that have turned out ok and wanted to tell them thank you as well. As you can imagine there was not a dry eye in the room. I was personally bawling like a baby. We learned a lot about ourselves and what we really want in adoption. The relationship we have with birth parents is a relationship that very few people understand. We love them very much and will consider them family for life. It may sound weird but I am thankful for the trials that we have gone through with our adoption process. With those trials it will make me never take my child for grantid and will hopefully make me a better Father and husband. I am thankful for Shaileen. She is the best wife I could ever ask for. With the things we have gone through it has made us closer as husband and wife. I am so glad that I get to spend eternity with her. I cannot wait for the day that we get to meet our child. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. I know that with Heavenly Father we can make it through anything because it has worked in our lives this far. Like always I would like to thank everyone for their constant support, prayers, fasting and love. We have felt many prayers in our behalf.