Big Boy Jax!!!!

Today Kurt had to work so when he got to the hospital he wanted to soak up every moment!!! Little peanut is so tiny he fits in one hand! 

Sooooooo tiny!!!!!

Our big guy is so amazing. We love him so much. We can't get enough. He is such a miracle and we amazed at how well he is doing. 

I love him so much. I cannot believe how things have turned out for us. Our Heavely Father works in mysterious ways. We are so blessed. I am happier now than I have ever been. I have always wanted to be a mother and tomorrow I officially will be. This is the most amazing feeling in the world I am sure. 

Pure bliss!!!

Big Surprise!!!!

I showed up at the hospital this morning at 6:30. I can't into the nursery and bent down to give my precious little man a kiss and noticed this... 

Our precious little man is so amazing!!! I started to sob when I noticed the oxygen was gone!!!!!! I cannot believe they were able to ween him off the oxygen this fast. When I walked in and saw it was gone and I looked at the nurse and said "Are you serious?" Our nurse said they were able to take it off at about 3:00am. I started to sob. He has been doing so great! Kurt sadly is at work... I text him a picture to let him know and he said "Way to go big boy!!!!!!!"

Jax... Mommy and and daddy are so proud of you! You are do amazing and so strong. We love you and couldn't be more proud of you!!!!!! 

The Latest News

Yesterday we were called again just like we were the other day by a caseworker with LDSFS saying that Sarrina was on her way to the hospital with bleeding. She said that she just wanted us to know and when Sarrina got there she would call us and let us know what was going on. Not much after that Shaileen got a call from Sarrina saying that she was alone at the University of Utah hospital and asked us to come be with her to comfort her. We were quite relieved as funny as it sounds to hear that she was at the University hospital because before she was at Pioneer Valley Hospital. If you know anything about that hospital at all you know that she does not want to be there. A little later in the story you will learn why. I was still at our house in Stansbury Park and Shaileen had just showed up to work so I immediatly got dressed and drove in and picked her up and we drove up to the hospital. Well, I shouldn't say immediatly because we trusted Siri to get us there the fastest and she took us to some random clinic that was way far off. Anyways, we finally got to the hospital about an hour or so after Sarrina called us. It was good to see her. The doctors and nurses were still trying to figure out what was going on with bleeding and ordered ultrasounds. When they ordered the ultrasound we found how dumb the tech was at Pioneer Valley Hospital because the baby was no longer breech (we know he could have flipped) but the placenta really did not move off of her cervix like the tech said that it did. The team of doctors determined that it would be best if she stay overnight if not over the weekend even. Sarrina was going to be transfered to another room that was not in the OB Emergency room and said that we could leave if we wanted because she wanted to get some rest. I drove Shaileen back into work so she could get a few more hours in. I laid in the car for about 2 1/2 hours and was able to nap for about 20 or so minutes until my last graveyard shift was up. We are so excited to meet Baby Cline but want him to cook as long as possible so he is as healthy as possible. When the doctors were doing the ultrasound they said that he is measuring, if I remember the numbers right; 4 weeks earlier that she is (30ish weeks) and they are estimating that he weighs somewhere around 3 1/2 pounds. As always we would appreciate everyones continued prayers that he is healthy  and everything goes according to thy will. THank you for your continued support. We truly do appreciate it. Hopefully we wont have too much to update you on for a couple of weeks.

We Are Going To Be Parents

I first off have to say thank you to everyone for all of their continued support. We have felt your love and prayers. You have no idea what it means to us and we would have never been able to be where we are today without you guys.

The evening of Fathers Day (6/16/16) Shaileen received a text saying someone is looking to place their baby boy  for adoption and wanted to know if we were still looking to adopt. We replied saying of course we were. We provided this person our blog address and personal information so they could give it to this expecting mother to look at us. She said that she would pass our information along and about an hour later we received another text saying that if we are up for it she will choose us. Holy Moly, that was quick and we didn't know what to think but were extremely excited. We were told that this expecting mother would contact us probably the next day. As you can expect we were excited all day to hear from her and later that evening on Monday June 17, 2013 we got the call from Sarrina. Shaileen was the one that spoke with her. It was a good conversation and she reaffirmed her decision to place with us. Shaileen said after the call that she kept referring to the baby as our baby. We decided that we would get together the upcoming weekend so we could get to know each other better. Sunday June 23, 2013 we picked up Sarrina at her friends house and drove to Baskin Robins. We spent around 1 1/2 - 2 hours getting to know each other and talking to each other. We talked about everything from what her other children are like to openness and even names. It is crazy to think that our crazy adventure is going to be coming to a new step here pretty soon in the next month when he is born so we can start a new adventure. He is due on Friday Aug 5, 2013 but she was telling us that all of her other children have been at least 2 weeks early. So, we are expecting probably closer to 4 weeks instead of 6 weeks until he is here. We learned that Sarrina has 8 children, the last 2 she placed with another family for adoption it sounded like several years ago. Shaileen and I believe we have a name picked out but are not positive yet so we are going to wait until we are positive that it is what we want to choose. Sarrina said that she is completely open for us to choose the name and does not care at all what we choose.

I am sure there will be more posts coming here soon, but again we just want to say thank you. Also, remember that there are tons of couples out there that are hoping to adopt that need your help to build their family. Each of our situations that were brought to us were because family and friends were thoughtful enough to open their mouths and not be shy to talk about us. We would like to ask that you continue to search and pray for hopeful adoptive couples as well as expecting parents. If you ever run across a situation let us know and we would be more than happy to pass it along to one of several couples that we know that are looking. Anyways, thanks again.


WE ARE GOING TO BE PARENTS!!!!

Father vs Dad

I am in toastmasters this year at work which is a group that meets weekly and practices public speaking and listening skills. Today it is my second speech. I decided with it being Fathers Day this past Sunday I wanted to speak about the following, hope you enjoy!

Are you going to be a Father or a Dad? It sounds like the same thing but couldn’t be further from the same thing. A Father is more of a biological term and does not refer to the man’s role or relationship with the child at all. Whereas a Dad refers to the man that is there in the child’s life caring for them. A dad shows he loves his children by interacting with him daily, letting them know that they’re a priority and that they give purpose to his life. It is far easier to be a father than a Dad. As I am trying to be a Dad through the wonderful gift of adoption I wanted to learn what I can do to be the best Dad to my children as I can because they deserve the best. I researched online came up with several things we can do not only as Dads but also Moms.

1.      Check in with your family during the day-

We all work here at Questar which means we are away from home a lot of the day five days a week. Children really enjoy hearing from their parents because they feel loved and wanted. If your children are old enough to go to school arrange for them to call you when they get home. Even just a few unhurried minutes will make a huge difference and show them that you truly care. If your child is young enough that they don’t go to school just call them throughout the day.

2.      Give your child undivided attention every day-

Put down your cell phone! This requires undivided attention to be successful. This will help build your relationship with them. This is where you listen to their ideas and get to know what is important to them and the things they love.

3.      At least once a week have fun together-

Each stage of your child’s life presents a new opportunity and they change and grow up so quick. As they are young you can start out simple by just going to the park and as they grow older adjust it to things not only they enjoy but things you enjoy as well. The important thing is to just enjoy the time you have with them.

4.      Talk about your values with your kids directly-

Don’t assume that your children will learn what your values are automatically. When the time is right and something comes up tell them what you think about a subject and why.

5.      Discipline –

When you come home from work and you find out that your son or daughter didn’t clean their room how do you react? Take a moment and think first before you react. Should your first interaction with the child be one of content or anger? Regardless, make sure whatever you decide make sure you react with love. A good idea is to first take your time to ask how their day at school was. From speaking with other parents I have found that this special time right when you get home or when the child gets home from school is the best time to talk to them because you are going to get the most honest sincere answers  most of the time.  Make sure the punishment also fits the crime.

6.      Nurture your relationship with your partner-

This is the single most important thing in my opinion. Your children believe it or not will grow up one day and sooner or later leave the house. Set an example for them. Boys will learn how to treat a girl by the way the Dad treats Mom and girls set their expectations that they will be treated the same way. Show them what real love is.

A father is someone who can easily leave the home. A father is someone that can easily cheat. A father is someone who can turn to alcohol and drugs. A father is someone who lets his family become a nuisance to him. A father believes that the world revolves around him.

This type of father doesn’t deserve your time, but most of all doesn’t deserve to be called Dad.

Any man can be a Father, but not every man can be a Dad!

No more 24/7 together

As I lay here in bed this evening I am thinking about how much I love Shaileen and how lucky I am to have her as my eternal spouse. The past 3 years since we have been both working for Questar we have been together 24/7 because we had the same shifts, carpooled together and even took breaks and lunches together. This week Shaileen started a new shift in dispatch with her new position. I have really taken all the time we have spent together for granted. It seems so weird not to be able to just do every little thing together. Shaileen, I love you and am so happy to have you as my wife and future mother to our children. Thanks for being you because that is perfect and why we got together in the first place. 

Finally, inside house photos

If you follow us on Facebook or Instagram I am sure you are sick of hearing about us moving into our new home. We wanted to document this for ourselves however. This house feels more like a home already more than our old house ever did. We are so excited to bring children into our home. Like always, if you know anyone that is thinking of placing their child for adoption please pass along our information. We would appreciate it more than you would ever know.

This is the living room that you see when you first walk in our door. We absolutely love it. We told each other that we better never have to paint in here however because we would have to hire someone to do it. There is no way I could get in the upper corners all by myself. 

These are the french doors into the office. 

On Memorial Day we went and bought a new computer desk that matches so much better in this room.

Dont mind the large painting in the background. We just have not hung it up yet. 

Shaileen gave me the ok to start collecting sports memorabilia, so we went out and purchased this shelving unit. I have bought a couple new things off ebay this past week to start filling it up. Cant wait to get them in the mail now.

We absolutely love our kitchen. It feels so much warmer and inviting now. When we have people over it doesn't feel so crammed anymore. 

As funny as it sounds one of our favorite things about this home is the food pantry. We have plenty of space downstairs to store the food but this is so much more efficient. 

Family room right off of the kitchen.

Half bath off of the family room on the main floor, and hooked to it in the next picture is the laundry room. 

Here soon we are looking forward to building some stools for the washer and dryer so they stand up higher. We are going to build them because they are ridiculously expensive to buy. 

Don't judge by how dirty my garage is right now. It is one of the last things I am worried about getting organized, at least we can pull the cars into it right now.

As you walk up the stairs to the upper floor this is the view you have of the living room. 

This is going to be the nursery in the future, some day soon i am going to set up the crib and everything else but I just am not in a big hurry. At least we have everything we need. 

This is another extra bedroom upstairs for when guests come stay with us. Nice and cozy.

One of the bedrooms Shaileen made into her craft room. We recently went and bought some tables so she can do her crafts on them. We just need to paint the nasty stripes off of the bedroom walls. 

Extra full bathroom upstairs. This is so much better than the nasty blue tile one we had before. I can't say enough how excited we are to be out of that house. 

Master bedroom- We just have not put anything up on the walls in here yet however because we have not decided what we want up yet. 

Master Bathroom, my favorite thing about it is the shower is tall enough where I don't have to crouch over to use it. Also, the seperate toilet room. 

Shaileen's painting turned out really cool I think in here. 

Master closet. 

This is one of the rooms in our basement. This one had the built in for the tv already. Sooner or later we are going to make this a work out room until we finish the basement. Perfect size for it I think. 

As I am sure you can tell we are using this for our storage and freezer room for right now. I definately need so organize this better quick... 

How cool is this room? The previous owners of this house had children that played in a band. They let the kids do what they wanted to finish this room so they soundproofed it and made it into a band room. The messages on the wall are pretty fun. 

We so look forward to building many memories in this home. We welcome anyone that wants to come out as well.

Packing and moving

Lately we have been packing like crazy to get ready to move to our new house. As you can tell from the pictures below our house is stacked with boxes in most rooms. We are excited to move and get into a bigger better house. We have been told that we should be planning to close on May 22nd. We are happy because we really did not want to move twice as we thought there was a possibility of there being a week between houses.

4 Year Wedding Anniversary

I first off have to say that I am the luckiest man on earth. The reason is I am married to my best friend. These last 4 years have been the best of my life easily. Shaileen has made our marriage so wonderful and perfect. She is the most loving, fun, caring person I know. She is going to make the best mother one day. I cannot wait for that day The coolest thing is we have eternity to go. Shaileen I love you!

Adoption Panel April 19, 2013

This past Friday we had the wonderful opportunity to attend an adoption panel that was put on by Families Supporting Adoption. We look forward to these get togethers so much because there are other people there that are in the same shoes as us as hopeful adoptive parents. The thing I like the most about these monthly get togethers though is I want to learn as much as I possibly can about being the best parent I possibly can. I know that I will never be fully prepared when we are chosen but why not be prepared with the most knowledge as we can. At this panel there was a wide variety of panel members that were from 2 families. There were adoptive parents, adoptive grandparents, birth mothers, and adopted adults. These families this past weekend reinstated my testimony of adoption in my heart.and how it is such a great thing. The love that each of these families had for each other was incredible on both the adoptive family side and the birth parent side. This panel brought back some great memories of the adoption classes that we were required to take over a 2 day period during our approval process. Before these classes we were not sure what we thought about the idea of open adoption and were sort of against it too. However, after going to listen to the panels of people it changed our heart completely on the thoughts of open adoption. The love we gained for expecting/birth parents grew indefinitely. If you ever have the opportunity of going to one of these panels I would definately recommend it. They are open to anyone to go. The idea that lots of people have with adoption is not accurate, just like LDS Family Service's motto says and it is so true is that. Adoption- Its about Love. How true is that? Expecting parents place their children out of love and hopeful adoptive parents are trying to grow their families out of love as well. I love adoption and am so thankful for it, without it we would never have the opportunity to grow our family.

Water Fight

Friday night we were sitting around not doing much when Shaileen decided to squirt with a water bottle. Lets just say we went into a full on war. I stole her squirt bottle and she went and found another one. The funny thing is that it would only spray big and not in a stream so I won! We have so much fun together and love each other so much.j

I Like Adoption

Today I was searching blogs like I do almost everyday and ran across The R House's Blog . She does an incredible job on each of her blogs but today hit me hard. I just about started crying here at work. Watch the video below. One of my favorite quotes went something like, "you can't choose which family you are born into biologically, however my parents picked me out individually out of millions of people." How true is that. Our children are going to be so loved. I truly believe our struggles with infertility have been for me. It has made me more patient, understanding and have more of a love for children than I had before. I look forward to the day that we can walk into the temple and be sealed not only for the time here on this earth but for all eternity. How incredible is it that even though they will not be born to us Heavenly Father still recognizes them as part of our family forever.

Cant sleep cause can't stop thinking

It has only been a week since baby was taken out if our home. Most days are decent but today I could not get him off of my mind. I keep thinking of where he is at, how is he doing, is he getting what he needs. We were fully invested in this baby boy for almost 5 months getting ready and preparing. We were in with our hearts 100%. I keep wondering what I am doing wrong to stop Shaileen from becoming the mother that not only she deserves to be but our future son or daughter deserves. It is hard to see her not only sad but hurt. She deserves so much more. I am laying on the couch right now because I don't want to disturb Shaileen's sleep and I keep thinking that this is the exact position I was laying in just a week ago sleeping with baby right on my chest the happiest man in the world it is scary how fast things can be taken away. I know deep down that things will be ok but I just keep wondering why. WHY?

How trials turn into good

When we went through our failed adoption placement back the beginning of August of last year it was one of the toughest things both Shaileen and I have ever gone through. When we got the phone call about 12 or so hours before we were supposed to sign papers saying that she had changed her mind it was easily the toughest moments of my life and most likely Shaileens to. It felt like there was no reason to live and we held each other and bawled in the middle of the brick oven restraunt. People were probably wondering what the heck happened and what was going on. We tried to sleep but we ended up talking for a lot of the night and holding each other. I think I actually cried myself to sleep until the nightmares came. The way we were both able to make it through the insanity was because of the love, prayers and support of our family, friends, ward members and coworkers. We certainly would not have been able to make it through it without them. After the situation happened I kept telling myself that things happen for a reason and that we can and will make it and will be stronger because of it. The main reason I am writing today is to express that it is absolutely true that things happen for a reason. My favorite thing to tell people that I gained from the experience is Shaileen and I are closer and love each other even more today than we did back then. She is the rock in my life. I love her so much and she makes me a better person each and every day. Another thing as funny as it may sound is it has increased my testimony of the gospel especially the plan of salvation. I know without a shadow of a doubt that Shaileen and I will be parents one day and that we will be an eternal family. I cannot wait for the day that we get to take our child to the temple with us to be sealed for time and all eternity. The thing that has hit me the most that I truely appreciate is several people that we have met that are in the adoption community. They have made us stronger people and we love them so much. You know who are. Trials bring lots of darkness into our lives during the initial time that we are going through them but when we fight through the issues we can and will come out stronger and better people because of them. Like always I personally want to thank everyone for their love, support and kindness towards us. You really do not know how much that means to us.

Church party with nephews

On Saturday night we watched 2 of my nephews. It was a blast. Our ward had their annual harvest festival which is a big party. It was so much fun watching Shaileen with the boys. She is going to be the best Mom when we are chosen to adopt. Alex and DJ absolutely love her as you can see in the photo of her reading with them. I love Shaileen more and more every day.